I have really been struggling with my weight and all of the realities and feelings attached to that of late. I have a plan in mind to begin the journey required to reach my physical goals. I've failed so many times in the past that the thoughts of those past failures hold me back from even trying again. It's demoralizing to try and try and try with no success. But I have to do something. I can't continue on as I have been. I want to feel good about myself and happy in my own skin again. I am not asking to be skinny. I just want to feel good more days than not about how I look and feel.
I did a reading to ask if my plans might be successful. It's a two card spread. The first is the issue at hand, and the second modifies it. I drew The Anchor and The Clover. How I interpret this is: If I stay steadfast and resolute to my plan and I do not let my doubt hold me back, then I will find success in my future. As I travel along this path, I should remember that happiness is not only in overall success but in the successes and happiness found in every day's wins.
I can work with that. It didn't take me a day to reach my current state. It's not going to change in a measurable way in a day either. I know this will be a long process. Longer than I want, but hopefully shorter than I imagine. I have milestones in mind to mark my progress. None of them are pounds and ounces.
I want to lower my blood pressure.
I want to improve my cholesterol. I am not taking meds now, and I do not want to have to do that.
I want to have fewer days with pain.
I want to look at myself and think I am pretty.
I want to be able to wear my favorite outfit again.
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